


Believe In (You and Me)

by SQ (proteinscollide)



Category: Basketball RPF
Genre: M/M, Yuletide Treat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-20
Updated: 2012-12-20
Packaged: 2017-11-21 17:31:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,014
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/600337
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/proteinscollide/pseuds/SQ
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jeremy's a team mate and his friend, but that doesn't mean Landry's feelings about him aren't complicated in the wake of his success.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Believe In (You and Me)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [littlerhymes](https://archiveofourown.org/users/littlerhymes/gifts).



> Many thanks to lj user=eponymous for beta-reading, canon info and cheerleading this to the end!

“One hundred, whoo!” Steve says, giving Jeremy a resounding high-five as he races by.

The locker room is chaos, gear strewn over every surface, but Jeremy is still sitting in his uniform, towel in hand. Landry watches out of the corner of his eye from his spot two lockers down; Jeremy keeps his elbows on knees, staring at the ground, as if he’s still trying to process the events of barely an hour before. But every time he makes a move to get up, get changed, another person flies past, pumped and grinning, hand outstretched for a high-five, a slap on the back, a pat on the ass. And each time, Jeremy looks up with a grin, face flushed and happy, then ducks his head as whoever it is inevitably adds another piece of praise about his game out there, 

“Jer, my man!” Shump hollers, drawing Jeremy in for a complicated handshake that leaves Jeremy laughing even harder, his eyes crinkling up. 

Landry looks away from the two, newbie and newbie, already climbing further and faster than he ever did as a rookie. Back then, he’d had his share of congrats and cheers, sure, but it was never like this. All those expectations after his first season, and he worries he’ll never achieve anything as giddy and career-defining as this. Landry fights a wave of emotion, a horrible bitterness that washes over him suddenly, drowning out the pride he feels for the team, the happiness he really does feel for his friend. 

“Hey, good game,” Shump breaks into his thoughts, coming up to pat him on the back too. But even as Landry acknowledges that he shot better tonight than he has for a while, a treacherous part of his brain points out they were mostly all off assists from Jeremy. It all comes back to Jeremy. 

_No_ , Landry thinks again, losing his eyes to shut it all out, _stop. Stop being like this_. Jeremy isn’t just his teammate, he’s his best friend on the team. He’d do better to remember that and be glad for the team’s good fortune.

Landry opens his eyes just in time to catch all 7 foot 1 of Tyson Chandler wrapping Jeremy in a crushing hug. He’s close enough to hear when Tyson murmurs, “You did real good, boy,” low in Jeremy’s ear, close enough to watch the flush spread up from Jeremy’s neck, the color in his cheeks. 

Landry gets socked in the gut then with the _other_ feeling he gets around Jeremy, the one he’s already been fighting for weeks now, the swooping, sickening drop in his stomach, the rush of possession. 

He takes a step towards them, close enough to reach out his hand and touch, but then Tyson steps back and lets Jeremy go. But they stand there chatting, beaming at each other, and Landry has to turn away quickly from them both. He shoves gear into his bag as fast as he can so he can get out of there pronto, away from this love fest. 

But as he hefts his bag up on his shoulder, ready to leave, Jeremy comes up and says softly, “Hey, I thought you would wait up.” He puts a hand gently on Landry’s arm and Landry stills. “Aren’t you coming to supper with us?”

Landry bites his lip and doesn’t have the heart to say no to Jeremy. Part of him is relieved when ‘us’ turns out to be just Jeremy and his family and a couple of close friends, but being included in this intimate circle makes him feel even worse about his inner thoughts. They make it to the restaurant okay, but Jeremy’s easily recognized a dozen times during the meal. 

Sometimes people even want both their autographs.

It’s almost one in the morning when they leave the restaurant. Jeremy’s parents are yawning as they say goodbye and get into the cab. There’s a hesitation before Josh says, “Are you coming - “ just as Jeremy says, “I think I’ll crash at Landry’s tonight.”

He darts a quick look at Landry as he says this. Surprised, Landry looks from one brother to the other, but Joshua doesn’t look put out as Landry answers, “Sure, mi couch es su couch also.” 

Jeremy laughs, cheeks still a little flushed from the beers he’s had, and claps him on the back. He keeps his hand there, easy and warm, as he steers them down the street towards Landry’s place. 

He’s been over enough times in the past few weeks to have almost developed his own routine to get ready for bed - helps himself to a pillow and a blanket from the cupboard, picks a pair of shorts and a worn, old t-shirt from Landry’s drawers to change into, and brushes his teeth with the spare that’s kept in the bathroom just for him. 

But after all that, he flops down on the couch, his long pale limbs a sprawl, and admits, “I don’t think I could sleep right now.” 

He doesn’t need to say why. Even with the lingering burn of jealousy in his chest, Landry understands - his first season, the adrenaline would keep him up long after the game was over, sitting alone in his quiet empty place, replaying the game endlessly in his head, reliving the best moments and regretting the lapses. He hasn’t forgotten - it just feels so long ago now. 

But Jeremy looks up at Landry, standing at the end of the couch, with an almost beseeching look on his face and Landry sits down obediently next to him. “Yeah, me neither,” he lies, suppressing a yawn. He reaches under the couch and pulls out two controllers. 

“Play for a bit?” he asks. 

Jeremy accepts it gratefully, joking “Anything but NBA!” and all Landry can do is laugh shortly. 

Jeremy picks MarioKart instead, which they normally love because it’s fun and light, going around and around the track with the candy colors and cartoon graphic and jolly, familiar music. But tonight really is Jeremy’s night - no matter what Landry does, he just can’t win. Landry’s gone down for the fourth time in a row when Jeremy raises his arms above his head, goofy in playful victory, and something in Landry snaps.

He’s only half joking when he dives at Jeremy and wrestles him to the ground, pinning him with the height and weight advantage he has on his side, and the surprise of the attack. Jeremy laughs and pushes lazily at Landry as he tries to wriggle from under him, as if expecting to break free easily. Landry holds his ground, tightens his hold on Jeremy’s shoulders and keeps him down. 

It feels good, in this moment, to have the upper hand for once. 

Jeremy struggles a little more then, planting his feet flat the on the floor as leverage. “Dude, I get it, you’ve definitely been working harder in training than me,” Jeremy jokes when Landry doesn’t budge. 

But he twists suddenly and manages to tip them over on their sides. Landry can feel himself get a bit light-headed from the jolt. He’s hard now as well and he wonders if Jeremy’s noticed, the way their legs are now slotted neatly between each other’s. He doesn’t know if he wants Jeremy to realize or not, so he puts his weight into it again and flips them over with Jeremy underneath him. Landry gets an arm across Jeremy’s chest, hand around his shoulder, squeezing hard. Jeremy grunts but he doesn’t protest, doesn’t call Landry out for being an ass, just thrashes around in Landry’s hold a few more times.

Jeremy finally goes lax under Landry, out of fight. “Uncle,” he says, gasping, but with a hint of amusement in his voice. “Man, you play much dirtier than Josh.”

Landry feels a little better at the feel of Jeremy relaxed under him, giving in. The knot in his chest starts to unwind, enough for him to loosen his hold on Jeremy. He ruffles a hand through Jeremy’s hair and Jeremy laughs, tipping his head back and pushing into the touch. 

They’re still pressed together, Jeremy’s back to the floor, Landry plastered against him from shoulder to thigh, skin to skin where their t-shirts have ridden up during the tussle. Landry knows he should get up, get off, but he closes his eyes and enjoys it for a moment, the heat of Jeremy under him. He must stay there a moment too long because when he opens eyes, Jeremy is looking at him with a puzzled smile.

“Hey,” he says uncertainly, and Landry doesn’t think, doesn’t let him finish; leans forward and kisses Jeremy. His lips are chapped, and it’s not quite comfortable at this angle, but Jeremy doesn’t move away so Landry takes the chance to deepen the kiss. He runs his tongue between Jeremy’s lips and slides his hand to cup around Jeremy’s neck and Jeremy makes a small, desperate noise and opens his mouth to him, just as Landry thinks, this is a terrible idea, the very definition of fucking up a friendship.

\----------------

It’s a different mood in the locker room barely one month later.

Jeremy has his elbows on his knees again, head in his hands, but this time there’s not a line of people lining up for high fives and hugs. Now everyone’s just head down, stripping off and sliding into street clothes at super speed, intent on getting out of there as soon as possible. Five losses in a row and the whispers are becoming shouts, that the magic is gone, that it was never more than an illusion of a better team. 

Landry finishes changing and he moves to leave too, one more silent escapee. But he looks back, at Jeremy now slowly easing out of his uniform, the strain in his face as he tries to avoid making his injury worse; and then he’s walking back over to Jeremy instead. 

“Hey,” he says, then stops. He’s doesn’t really know what to say after that. Commiserations? Encouragement? He’s not sure what Jeremy want or needs right now, what would make him feel better. He settles for a hesitant pat on Jeremy’s shoulder.

Jeremy looks up at the touch and he places one hand over Landry’s unexpectedly, keeping him there. Landry remembers then that they haven’t touched like this – deliberate, intimate – since that night in his apartment. He feels that drop in his stomach once more, and he wills himself to not flush at the memory, wills his body not to give him away. 

“Thanks,” Jeremy says, low. He gives Landry a small smile, but there are dark circles under his eyes and there’s a hesitation when he moves, as if he’s trying to stave off pain from certain movements. It’s been a tough few weeks for him in particular, and Landry’s seen firsthand the bitter flip side to the adulation, doesn’t envy Jeremy his time in the sun anymore. 

Landry picks up his bag to leave, but then Jeremy presses his hand to Landry’s hip, a fleeting touch, and he says, “Hey, um, can you wait up for me – can I stay over at yours? I don’t want to – to be alone tonight.”

It’s the same routine – blanket, pillows, pyjamas - when they get to Landry’s but there’s a listlessness to Jeremy this time. Landry comes back into the lounge after a shower and finds him lying onto the couch, a rigidity to his frame, hands clasped on his chest, eyes wide open staring up at the ceiling. It’s not going to be an easy night for him.

“You wanna play?” Landry offers. 

He kneels on the floor by Jeremy, bending down to reach for the controllers from where he kicked them under the couch, so it’s only has he straightens up that he sees, too late and out of the corner of his eye, Jeremy diving at him. The momentum pushes them both to the ground and Landry has a moment of exciting, terrible déjà vu as Jeremy lands on him heavily, his face screwed up in a frown. 

Landry knows he couldn’t really hurt Jeremy if he tried, but he’s also incredibly aware that he _can’t_ hurt Jeremy, not with his knee already causing him pain. He can also tell that Jeremy’s trying to work out his frustration and anger with the way things have gone, the way the fairytale is failing him. Landry recognizes that caged energy, the frustration, the resentment fighting to the surface. He’s just surprised to see it in Jeremy; Jeremy with his smiling patience, his good-natured perseverance, and his initial cautious distance about personal space. He’s gotten so much better with the way the team easily touches each other, the high fives and hugs and even the occasional kiss on the cheek - but Landry still remembers the slow, adorable flush high on Jeremy’s cheeks the first time he patted him on the ass.

So yeah, it’s surprising on so many levels for Jeremy to jump him, to be pinned under Jeremy, to have Jeremy straddling his thighs, knees and hands either side of him. Surprising, and an incredible turn-on. With their bodies pressed up against each other he can feel himself getting hard, his heart speeding up. Landry glances up at Jeremy, tries to meet his gaze, see if he‘s noticed by the effect this is having on him. Jeremy’s tongue is poking out from between his lips, a moment of concentration, and he’s not pulling away, even as his thigh slides between Landry’s legs and he must be able to feel how hard Landry is now, the way he’s rubbing up desperately against Jeremy. Jeremy’s panting a little too, maybe from the exertion of throwing himself at Landry, but Landry acts on a hunch and shifts his hips a little under Jeremy, feels that he‘s hard too. 

And Landry finally realizes that maybe pulling away last time was what fucked them up in the first place, not kissing. 

He takes a deep breath and pushes at Jeremy roughly, until he overbalances and tips to the side, his stranglehold broken. Landry rolls them over neatly, until he’s straddling Jeremy now, holding his wrists above his head with one hand. “Is this what you wanted?” he says, mouth by Jeremy’s ear. “Are we done with that part now?”

All the fight goes out of Jeremy, now lying under Landry, just like he was last time. But this time, it’s Jeremy who reaches up and pulls him down for a kiss, wrapping one leg around Landry’s. And this time, Landry doesn’t pull away, learns the lines and sounds of Jeremy’s body as they make out slowly. Landry already knows Jeremy is ticklish, but he gets to discover how else he can make Jeremy shiver, nudging the spot under this chin with his lips, nipping at the soft skin at the top of his arms, mouthing at the crease of his wrist, where he can feel the fast patter of Jeremy’s heart, a twitch just under the skin, under his tongue. 

And then it’s Jeremy’s turn, easing his hand into Landry’s pants, wrapping it around his cock, a warm and calloused touch. 

“Is this okay?” he asks shyly, into the corner of Landry’s mouth, and all he can do is open his mouth a little wider, slide his lips across Jeremy’s and gasp, “Yeah, definitely, yes.” He closes his eyes and drops his head to Jeremy’s shoulder as he continues to stroke him, that strange swooping feeling in his stomach again, but he understand it now, it feels right, because Jeremy is his, and he’s Jeremy’s. He comes with a muffled shout against Jeremy’s neck, mouthing at the skin blindly as his body relaxes in the afterglow. 

“Could I - ?” he asks a little later, already moving down Jeremy’s body, peeling down his shorts and looking up with a little worried glance. Jeremy blushes and throws his arm across his face as the flush comes up on his cheeks and he says yes in as wrecked a voice as Landry’s. It takes Landry a little while to get the hang of it, choking the first time Jeremy’s hips shoot up as he takes Jeremy’s cock slowly into this mouth, and when he gets mixed up and forgets how to breathe through his nose for a moment, but they get into a rhythm, Landry’s hands bracketing Jeremy’s hips to hold him down, and then Jeremy’s gasping and saying his name in a broken voice and Landry pulls back to pump Jeremy a few times with his hand before he comes. Jeremy’s breathing hard as he tugs at Landry’s shoulders, pulling him back up to kiss him, though each kiss gets less and less intense as tiredness overcomes them. 

Landry’s drifting to sleep on the floor, even with Jeremy still collapsed in a heap on him, and half-thinking that his back is going to hurt something terrible tomorrow morning if he stays here all night, when he hears Jeremy ask quietly, “If you wanted this too, why did you run away last time?” 

“I was afraid of hurting you,” Landry says. “Of stuffing it up, making a mess of things.”

“Things go wrong anyway,” Jeremy says dully. “I thought I could - I wish – “

He shifts, curling up away from Landry. It’s too quiet in the dark room, and then Landry can see Jeremy’s shoulders are shaking. 

“No, hey,” Landry says. He reaches out his hand for Jeremy’s, lacing their fingers together, pulling him up. They stumble the few steps to the couch and then Landry lies down along its length and pulls Jeremy against, back to Landry’s chest. Landry wraps his arm around him and pulls the blanket over them both. 

“Don’t – there’s no need for us to worry,” he murmurs to Jeremy, “Whatever happens the rest of the season, beyond that, I know we’re going to be alright.” 

He keeps one arm around Jeremy’s shoulder, fingers stroking small circles on his skin, partly to reassure himself too; but he’s sure at least that it’s true for the two of them.


End file.
